


In Another Lifetime

by nakedchrisevans



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Drabble, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-01
Updated: 2014-09-01
Packaged: 2018-02-15 17:19:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2237157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nakedchrisevans/pseuds/nakedchrisevans
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha's leaving Steve, knowing fully well that they cannot have a relationship outside of work.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Another Lifetime

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I would imagine their next lifetime to be the one in Nanny Diaries. I am a sucker for angst, even though I love fluff and humor, but feeling angsty about Romanogers and really, isn’t everyone? At least in Nanny Diaries, they get to end up together.
> 
> Hope you enjoy.
> 
> I will write fluff and humor for them later.

Title: In Another Lifetime  
Genre: Angst.  
Pairing: Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanoff  
Rating: PG-13  
Word Count: 858

Natasha knows that this was twisted and fucked up and it would never work out between them. However badly she wants him, however badly she wants to be by his side, fighting and loving and caring and bantering and cuddling and all those things other normal people in relationships do, she could not have any of it.

It was a breezy day and the park situated two blocks from his apartment was relatively deserted. The swings creaked as it is pushed by the wind and the leaves are falling. A young boy was playing with presumably his younger sister in the sandbox, and she gets some sand in her eyes, so the boy rushes her across the street into their house, into the safety of his family. She wonders if she can ever have children like that, if she can ever have the luxury to dream of a home and security of a loving family.

“Natasha.”

Steve rudely awakened her from her daydream, and she is snapped back into reality. She almost lost her guard, and it was so unlike her to do that sort of thing. He sat down next to her on the bench, wearing a pair of dark-washed jeans and a gray sweater over a tight-fitted black t-shirt. Oh gosh, he looked delicious.

They sat in silence for a while, both looking out onto the sandbox, where the two children were playing. Natasha knew that Steve knew what she was going to say, but she also knew Steve would not speak of it until Natasha is firm in her resolve.

“I’m leaving.”

Steve closed his eyes and sighed. He knew it was coming, but in the deepest corner of his heart, he had just a glimmer of hope that she wouldn’t leave him, that they could make it work.

“Where?”

Natasha gave a long silence before answering.

“I’m not sure.”

The winds enveloped them and the trees started to shake gently, shedding reddish-brown leaves above them. The air grew colder as the day creep in its closing.

“Why does it have to be like this, Nat? It doesn’t have to be so complicated.” His voice was on the verge of desperation. His eyes were searching for hers.

“Steve, it’s been great, really. I wouldn’t trade my experience with you for the world. But it is complicated. We’ve been in near-death situations more than I can remember, and that is more traumatizing every moment because I’m holding my breath every time you get hurt. I’ve been in near-death situations before, and it never fazed me so much like this.” She swallowed. Her saliva tasted bitter, as if what she was saying was totally not what she felt. As if it was someone else who was saying all these things to Steve and she was merely an observer.

“I absolutely cannot go on without you.” He said matter-of-factly.

“Steve, I’m fucked up. We’re fucked up. The whole goddamn Avengers is fucked up. We don’t need to add a fucked up relationship into the equation.” She held his hands and squeezed it tight. Her eyes were brimming in tears.

“But I just want you. Nothing else.” He’s fighting back his tears and it was stupid, really because superheroes don’t cry about spoilt relationships.

“You can’t. You know it and I know it. You’re Captain America and people’s needs come before yours.” She said cautiously, just to remind him what he said over and over again in previous missions.

“Maybe this time I want to be selfish. Just one thing that I want in life and that’s the one thing I can’t have? I want you, Natasha!” Steve’s voice was hoarse, he was desperate and damn it, he cannot imagine his life without the vibrant red-headed girl with a hot-blooded personality to match.

“Maybe in another lifetime, we can be together. Maybe in our next lifetime, we can be just a normal couple living in New York. You could live on the upper-east side, and I could be a totally down to earth girl who is totally not from the upper-east side. We would meet at a college party, or by bumping into each other. Maybe in another lifetime we can grow old and have children and grandchildren and we wouldn’t have to be in danger and in near-death situations all the time.” Natasha liked that. Natasha liked to think that she still could be with Steve, even in another lifetime.

“Promise me that in the next lifetime, you will not try to set me up with crazy girls that are totally not my type.” Steve was laughing and wiping her tears.

“I promise.”

Steve kissed her gently, his eyes closed but his eyebrows furrowed, because it was a sweet, painful kiss. The last kiss he thought. Her mouth tasted like honey, it felt soft and plump and red and delicious. He etches the memory of her lips, of her laugh, and her tears and everything about her that he loves and hates.

They broke the kiss.

“Goodbye Steve.”

See you in the next lifetime.


End file.
